Karen - the end of the story

On November 16, 2009, Karen passed away from Stage IV lung cancer. It was a matter of weeks from the fatal diagnosis to the end and she continued to fight all the way - even while holding a Winston in one hand and the oxygen hose in the other. I was there at the end with all of the adult "children" and Alan - her husband. When it came time for the services, I was asked to say a few words. These are reproduced below. As for the "middle" of Karen's and my story.......that will await another day.

Hello, my name is Ed F***** and I was the practice husband. Some of you might have some familiarity with the difficulties of that time – for me; but you may not appreciate the negative consequences for Karen.

She was a free spirit trapped in a conventional bind where there were expectations that were simply outside the range of choices she could be comfortable with. This led to stress, conflicts and, in terms she might prefer – negative energy. Doesn’t mean she was a bad person, simply someone who preferred life outside of the rules and conventions most of us feel compelled to observe.

And we all know what happens to outsiders; read the books, saw the movies – and there was hardly ever a happy ending.

But Karen managed to be an exception to that as well. She found her true hero, Alan B***, who surrounded her with an environment of unconditional love, acceptance and the emotional nourishment that allowed her to progress from living to thriving.

And that she did. You’ve heard some of her poetry; on display is one of her project’s and there are a great many photos which demonstrate her growth.

In all of that, with Alan and surrounded by an expanding family, she had her happy ending.

But there really has not been an ending; her story continues and will live on, directly through the children, grandchildren and, as a legend, for generations into the future. Indirectly, there are a great many people whose lives have been touched through the positive influences of Karen.

She will not be forgotten.